Truth
by ReleaseThroughWriting
Summary: The story of a young girl who faces the struggle of bullying and being an outcast.
1. Chapter 1 Part 1

Hi

I have a story to tell you.

See I've not really had a lot of friends my whole life. Mostly it was just me and my friend Jade all through elementary and junior high. Then I got into Hollywood Arts and I thought that would all change.

And for a while it did.

I had lots of friends, I went on lots of dates, Jade started dating Beck and everything was amazing.

Until they found out the truth about me.

I began to loose friends,be avoided in the hallways, eat lunch in the bathroom. I never really understood why they thought I was weird. I still don't Hollywood Arts is supposed to be a place where kids are accepted for who they are. I guess my "friends" didn't get the memo, or else I wouldn't be here, in the stall of the bathroom alone.

Hi, my name is Cat Valentine, and I am a lesbian.

When I was younger, I never realized my feelings were so different from everybody elses. I thought it was normal that I wanted to kiss Jade. I thought it was what every other girl did. Every time Jade slept over I really badly wanted to kiss her, but I never had the guts to do it. She would always ask me what was wrong, cause I would get all red and flustered and frustrated, but I would tell her the same thing every time.

"I'm fine."

It was obvious I wasn't. Why couldn't she see that?

I got hit with reality when I entered High School.

Jade got Beck right away. When she first saw him in the hall she leaned close to me and whispered, "I'm going to fuck that boy." I guess he thought the same thing cause six months later they were steady. It hurt, a lot, to see then together. That could have been me smiling at her like she was the most amazing thing in the workd and she would snile at me the same way, sharing kisses behind the bleachers. But no.


	2. Chapter 1 Part 2

When she slept over one night, I thought I could trust her with my secret. I thought she would be understanding of my situation.

Again, I was wrong.

She called me a freak. A Dyke. She said I shouldn't be around her anymore. Then she left. And by school the next week, everyone knew. The whole school, all my friends, even Sikowitz. I had no one. The one person who was at least a little bit caring was Tori. But she seemed pretty weirded out and eventually stopped hanging around with me.

Why was I like this?

I am attracted to girls and I hate it. I lost all my friends, those homophobic jerks. They don't understand. I'm the same Cat they hung out with before, same person, same bubbly , not personality anymore. I've stopped interacting with family. My brother is always trying to get me to play video games with him, and usually I do. Or did. I don't anymore. I can't . I'm broken. I was stupid for trusting Jade in the first place. I shoukd have known. She was a bitch to others but not me because I was "special" to her. But somehow that changed when I said I love girls. I didn't tell her I loved HER. Just girls in general. She must have peiced it together with the way I act around her and how I go red and stuff. She' smart like that.

The problem is, is that I still love her.

I hate that I do, but I can't stop. It hurts to see her all cute with Beck. It hurts to think about how we used to be best friends and she would hug me. I never wanted to let her go.

But now she's gone.


	3. Chapter 2 Part 1

Going to school is hard. I've never been so lonely in my life. In class, no one talks to me,but they all talk about me. Rumors have been spread about how tried to seduce Jade or some other bullshit lie. In my classes with Jade she pretends she hates me, but she glances at me, whether it's on perpose or it's just her brain trying to comprehend everything by looking at me or reflex. I can always feel her eyes on me, like they're staring at my mind, wondering what goes on. It doesn't matter thought. She abandoned me. Told everyone.

Whatever.

I've learned to stop caring. Or at least, tried to look like I've stopped caring.

I walk into school, same as always, dreading the day, waiting to go home and sit in my room. I'm alone there, but at least no one judges me in my room.

The first person I see is Lane, and he's headed right towards me.

"Cat?" he says.

I nod. I don't talk much anymore.

"I need to speak to you in my office."

He begins to walk. I stay where I am.

He turns around. "Cat. Let's go."

I contemplate just walking in the other direction, away from him and everyone else. But even though avoiding things is the one thing I want to do most, I can't ignore Lane. He's my only friend left.

We reach his office and once I'm inside, I feel completely different. I feel... safe.

"Cat, sit down. Get comfortable." he starts. " We need to have a chat."

I sit,trying to be as comforrtable as I could, failing miserably. I can never been comfortable.

I manage words. "What about?"

He sighs. "Cat, it seems you have been acting strange. I know this whole situation with Jade has gone around the school. I see you getting bullied, being alone."

I was about to walk out right then until I heard him say

"This happened to my neice too."

Ifroze. Every year at the beginning of the year, Lane gives a speach to the entire school about howhis neiece commited suicide because of bulllying, but I never knew it was because...

"Lane... she was..."

"Lesbian?" he finished for me. "Yes. She always told me everything that was going on. She said I was


	4. Chapter 2 Part 2

the only one she could talk to. The only one who understood." He sniffed, like he was tryng to hold back tears. "She was just starting ti get better. That's when she got pushed too far. She ended up jumping. Over the Northridge highway."

I was speachless. He knew exactly what I was going through.

I began to cry. Not your normal crying, but the silently crying where the tears just start streaming down your face uncontrolably. The worst kind of crying.

Lane came over and sat down beside me. He wrapped his arms around me and I layed my head on his shoulder. He gets it. He gets me. I knows that I'm no different than the Cat I was before.I sloed my eyes and whispered, "Thanks Lane."

I felt him smile. "No problem, boo."

Later he called my parents to come get me early. He explained the whole situation to my parents which is information I was avoiding telling them. Surprisingly they were not as awful asI thought they would be.

I had one last talk with Lane before I left. He said we should meet once a week. I asked him if one of the sessions we could bring Jade in, becuas something needed to be settled. He agreed that, not quite yet, but soon, he wanted to do that.


	5. Chapter 2 Part 3

The next day was no different. Avoided but spied on by Jade, weird looks from Sikowitz, no looksfrom former friends, and whispers about me from strangers. Great.

By lunch I was feeling sick. I didn't eat lunch and threw up my breakfast. While in the bathroom , I heard someone come in and I tried to be as quiet as possible. but then they said "...Cat?"

Jade.

"Cat what are you doing?"

I didn't answer.

"Cat I know you're in there I can see your pink boots by the way you're kneeling."

I stood up and stepped out of the stall. "What do you want?" I snarled at her.

She looked awful. Baggy and red eyes, hair a bit messy, dressed sloppy. She sighed. "Cat I neef to talk to you."

"About?" I said.

"About us. I shouldn't have acted the way I did. I guess I just freaked out and I needed to figure out how I felt about you telling me so I ended up being a jerk about and telling everyone and rumorss spread and ugghh! I never meant for it to get this bad! I just need to figure out myself."

Wait.

she couldn't... "Does that mean..."

I means..." she siad, not looking at me. "It means... I feel the same way..."

No.

**A/N: Heyy, guys!**


	6. Author's Note

Heyy, guys! Sorry the chapters are broke Fanfiction is being a butt lol. Just wanted tos ay that! And that I don't own Victorious! :)


	7. Chapter 3

This had to be some kind of sick joke. It HAD to be. She hates me. She loves Beck. No one changes that quickly.

"What's your angle?!" I yell at her, not caring if anyone heard. "You wouldn't do this! You're Jade West! You don't just chang your mind that quickly! A lot of times you don"t cahnge your mind at all!" I continued to scream. I let all that was botttled up inside of me pour out through my words and I couldn't stop.

"Cat, I-"

"Save it!" I interrupted. "If this is some kind of sick prank, I swear-"

Then she kissed me.

My first thought was to push her off of me, that she was discusting and shouldn't be playing tricks on me, but I realized that she was actually kissing me. Jade West, my crush siince sixth grade, was kissing me! And she wasn't stopping. She grabbed me and pulled me in to her, slipping her toungue inside my mouth.

But then she pulled away, and it felt too soon.

"Cat, I love you and I want to be with you."

Never did I think this would happen.

I am now in a relationship with Jade West.

.

.

Fuck my life.

Why would she do that to me? Did she think it wouldn't hurt? Did she think I would laugh along? Haha very funny. I went back to Lane's office again today and cried. That's all I did was cry. And I told him the entire story. All of it. The apology, my blow up, the kiss, the lies, the laughing. That's what she does now. She laughs at me when she see me in the hall. I should have known she couldn't be trusted. I should never have given her my heart.

I found a not in my locker today, saying that freaks like me should die. And it was signed "Give It Up".

Our duet.

Our Karaoke duet at Karaoke Dokey. God, I hate that song. I sang it with her. It was amazing, too. it sounded amazing. Why does that not mean anything to her anymore?

My phone dinged.

It was my brother.

"Cat, this bag of feet won't fit in my trunk. -Josh"

I turned off my phone. I couldn't handle him then. It was too much.

I go to turn off my phone when it dings again.

Mom.

"Cat, sweetie. How are you doing at school? -Mom"

I turn my phone off.

.

.

"Now can anyone tell me what forshadowing is?" Sikowitz asks in class.

Tori raises her hand.

Sikowitz points at Tori and says, "Yes, Hermione?"

After the Harry Potter joke, I tune out the rest of his blabbering. I didn't know how much more of this I could take.

"Cat?"

I jolt back to reality to see Sikowitz right in front of me holding out a box.

"Pick a role from the box."

I reach my hand in and pull out a slip of paper. 'Damaged teenager" Fitting.

The bell rings and everyone get up from their chairs.

"WAIT!" Sikowitz yells at everyone. "You are all old hipsters!" Everyone begins to act.

I leave the room.


	8. Chapter 4

The walk home was longer than usual. Normally, I would walk with Jade or even Tori, or drive, but my brother had the car.

It also felt different. It wasn't the nice, sjnny weather we are known for having. It was cloudy, like the sky and the winds knew exactly how I felt. Sometimes it feels like everyone hates me. Well, except for Lane. Ever since I met him he's been nothing but caring and sweet to me. I guess I remind him of his neice. Maybe that's why he's so worried about me right now. He thinks he could have done more to save his neice, so he is trying with all his heart not to lose me. I doubt it thought . He's probably just a nice person Nice to everyone.

While I was lost in thought a car drove through a puddle and splashed me. I didn't get a chance to see the person. Someone from school, probably. I couldn't take it anymore. What did I do that is so wrong. I told Jade a secret. Big deal! If someone would at least talk to me I could clear up all the stupid rumors that are going around. But no one will even look at me. The pain is sometimes unbarable.

When I got home I turned my phone on to see 5 missed calls.

From Beck.

Beck?

I redialed his number. "Hello?"

"Cat? Cat!" he sounded relieved. "Cat! I'vecaledd you five times! Where were you?!"

"My phone was off. Umm why are you calling me?" I tried not to sound harsh.

He sighed. "Cat I've been worried about you! You haven't been eating with us at lunch, well I don't think you've been eating at all!"

"Well Beck!" I half-yelled, not caring if I sounded mean. "You and Jade and everyone else in the whol fucking school has been spreading awful rumors about me! And laughing at my in the halls and splashing me on the street with their cars!" I started to cry. "I didn't do anything! Jade played a discusting prank on me and it was a group effort! So if this is another mean joke I will lose the rest of my mond that I still have!"

Silence.

"Cat. I'm sorry about all that. When Jade told me about what happened I originally was weirded out. Though you were now different. But I just realized that you're still the same bubbly, amazing Cat you ere before!I am truly sorry."

More silence.

Was he faking? I know how good an actor he is. He made Helen cry. But something about how he's aying it makes it seem real. Was he...

"Beck, are you crying?"

He continued on like her hadn't heard my question. "Come over. I wanna see you in person. Make sure you are actually the same." He chuckled a bit, even though I could tell he was serious.

To be honest, I'm not the same Cat, but not because of me being out. Because of the reation to me coming out to Jade. The bullying. I couldn't take it. I didn't change my hair but somehow it doesn't look the same. I still wear the same style and colours of clothes, but before pink was a part of me, but now it's just something I have.

"Not tonight, Beck. Just talk to me tomorrow."

"But Jade-"

"Beck!" I interrupted. "If you really still want to be my friend then hang with me at chool. Show me that you don't care what other people think."

Silence.

"Okay." he answered.

And with that, I hung up.


End file.
